Emotional intelligence in times of polarization

These are times of polarization in the world. They are promoted by vaccines and by those who do not want them; those who fight for environmental causes and those who want to look elsewhere to continue producing as before; governments of one color and those of the other; social networks full of aggressive messages and that disqualify and deny anyone who is different from themselves, while with a tone of morality they accuse their victims of being intolerant. Really, the world upside down or perhaps, the unconscious world without real mirrors.

Polarization and the inability to see other people as equals and part of the same system is, in part, the permanent problem of the ego, that part of our mind that wants to invent an “I” separate from a “you” and seek enclose a space that feels its own and of value, for which it seeks to differentiate itself, move away and build the world in opposition, in the eternal logic of: “I am not like you.”

This that occurs in our mind and in our social and family life, is also replicated in the larger systems, in society as a whole, the institutions, the global system. It is the inability to look at oneself with honesty, in order to later be able to see the other for what he is: an other as legitimate as oneself.

However, to advance on that path, you have to go up evolutionary steps. It is not reaching out and saying it. It is about taking an inner journey that requires dedication, balls and a real desire to improve, not to appear superior.

This trip requires working on self-awareness, looking at yourself, recognizing what is there without hiding or hiding under the rug. Self-awareness is the first pillar in the development of emotional intelligence, and an essential step to advance to the second pillar: self-regulation.

That ability to regulate our impulses, to stop reacting to things and begin to choose our steps and decisions. When we are not capable of self-regulation, then it is easy to establish this polarity, because I do not take care of what is mine and I deposit it in a projected way in the “evils of the other”, and in this way the polarity continues to be reinforced instead of advancing to evolutionary integration.

Self-motivation, as a third axis of emotional intelligence, also shows us the revelation of activating within us the fuel that moves our lives, and to stop being circus animals that are trained to react to rewards and punishments from the environment. Thus, many people explain their decisions and behavior “because the other person did or said something”, without being responsible for themselves or their own motivations.

Empathy and social skills are the other two pillars of emotional intelligence, and these help us to connect with those around us, to tune into their ideas and emotions, to understand their motivations and positions and from there to access other internal worlds , expand our mental map and also enrich our own experience.

Connect as equals, understand that one’s own and that of others are housed in different “homes”, but that they are part of the same thing, a great system in which we are all the same in essence, and that other people’s paths also serve me to reflect my own steps in autonomy and ability.

The current polarization shows us the enormous path we have in learning to be what we are and then build with other people and that mission is beautiful, noble and necessary to be done.

Every time you see yourself in polarity or witness that polarization, don’t join in. Take a step back, and recognize yourself, learn something new about yourself and move on. Not forwards or to surpass someone else, but upwards but within yourself, using emotional intelligence in times of polarization.

Comments are closed.