estrategias para ganar

Win from a new perspective

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The idea of ​​win-lose as a dynamic to build relationships, businesses and human spaces already seems “old” to us. For many years we have been listening to the need to move to win-win spaces, in more balanced relationships, that can be projected over time and that, finally, contribute to all the parties involved really feeling that they are making progress in what they are looking for. .

However, although we can understand this, listen to it and repeat it over and over again, the truth is that it does not happen on most occasions. We continue to find again and again the idea of ​​building essentially transactional links, where I earn what I want and give you something that I have, and that many times I don’t even know (and I’m not interested) if it will really help you to be better or conquer your own goals.

This disposable and superficial logic, a reflection of the times in which we live and the way we relate to ourselves and the people around us, is expressed in the most diverse instances of social life. The look of “what can I get for myself” is what finally generates greater resistance, increases mistrust and limits the possibility of building real opportunities.

Personally, win-win seems appropriate, more fair and horizontal. However, I prefer to look for win-win-win, that is, to get creative in the way we do things so that my counterpart can win, I win and together generate enough surplus energy, knowledge, time, resources, etc. , which allows us to help third parties, which some see as support for the environment or the positive externalities of projects or businesses.

Today I was in a meeting with a person from the board of directors of a human resources association in a Latin American country, and I saw, forcefully and without nuance, how he embodied the win-lose look. A philosophy deeply rooted in the scarcity perspective, that everything is “for me” and typical of the blindness (or laziness) of finding new opportunities when two parties meet.

Every human bond has the potential to open the way to the divine, to a friendship, to creativity, to new ventures, to generous and selfless collaboration, among many other things.
Personally, it seems urgent to me to change our perspective, leave pettiness behind and shake our minds to find new ways in which we can really do something that contributes to the lives of as many people as possible, not to feed our own egos, not to make a better business, but to enhance the talents that each person has and use them for the right thing, to do a greater good, simply because we can do it and never again with the calculator in hand.

When we execute win-lose, we always ultimately lose. If we play win-win, we build symmetrical relationships that are good, although not to their full potential. But if we move forward with win-win-win, we can transform our lives and that of many people, turning our abilities into a talent that the world around us truly needs and enjoys.

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Where is coaching and where is it going?

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The 2000s were a great time of expansion of coaching on a global level. It became fashionable in organizations, consultants received more and more requests for coaching for their teams and schools that trained professionals in this methodology expanded greatly, with the problems of any non-organic expansion, that is, with variety quality and diversity of work standards.

Twenty years have passed since that great explosion of coaching and today the situation is different, and as in many other professional areas, the pandemic has also played a role in this current transformation.

The last two years generated, globally, that many coaching schools could not stand the quarantines and simply went bankrupt, having to stop operating. On the other hand, many unemployed people launched into the digital market to offer courses, consultancies and also coaching, being a “boom” of the “influencers”, leaving the illusory idea that these services require doing lives, uploading motivational phrases and inflating the personal ego, as if that were directly related to being able to develop a real profession or a sustainable and scalable business model.

As a coach for almost 14 years, owner of a training school with a presence in 14 countries, such as Smart Coach, with which we have been in existence for almost 10 years, and author of the integrative coaching model, I have seen a lot in this small world of coaching (and I’m sure I have much more to see), and I have a perhaps different look than many others who speak on the internet.
The future of coaching is not really digital. As you read it. I am dedicated to education and technology for companies and universities, being in love with technological potential, but I do not believe that the future of coaching is truly digital. Rather, they will be hybrid experiences where digital quality must trump zoom. But of course, coaches usually don’t know much about technology, or much about trends to be honest.

This illusion of the ego, the credentials and logos, the well-posed photos with many filters or the phrases that want to appear wise, are for those who are slapping the hands of drowning, because those who are really doing great things, promoting their careers and supporting tens, hundreds and even thousands of people, is happening quietly, behind the scenes.

So, where will this go? Obviously I don’t have a crystal ball to know for sure, and I only intend to share a glimpse of this for colleagues who with passion and dedication want to dedicate themselves to a beautiful discipline of accompanying people in their transformation and the achievement of goals that improve life and transform things.

Personally, I believe that the world of coaching training is going to be grouped into two categories, 100% online programs, where the difference will be the brand of the institution and the price of the training, therefore, their prices will continue to fall and the quality, for the most part, will too. And those formations that provide immersive experiences, both virtual and real, that is, those that manage to build true laboratories in the metaverse for formations and those that allow them to meet again face to face, in luxury experiences, where training and trips through the world can be combined. world, multicultural relationships and face-to-face experience will be the hallmark of unforgettable learning experiences.

In the case of coaching professionals, we will have, in my opinion, three large groups. Those who struggle to gain “likes” and “followers” as a measure of their success, being truly irrelevant and only referents for those who have greater self-esteem problems than the coach himself, those who will not be able to develop sustainable careers.

A second group specialized in the axes of true demand in companies or institutions, supporting topics such as cultural transformation, inclusion and diversity, adaptability and innovation, adding direct value to the institutions’ KPIs, and a third group, who will put their knowledge to service of models, technological systems or design of experiences, leaving the “one by one” to think about how to take what has been learned from the human to systems that massively support the current adaptation challenges.

Thus, we will see the usual again. The elitization of experiences of high impact and real transformation, and the trivialization of those who fight in an environment of crumbs and futile appearances. Where do you want to be?

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The new professional skills

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At this point in the cultural, social, technological and economic transformation that we are experiencing globally, it should be no mystery to anyone to know that education needs to adapt like never before in its history. This adaptation does not only consist of the incorporation of new curricular content or teaching-learning technologies, but essentially a change of focus, to encourage students to develop skills that really impact the environment in which they must develop.

Added to the skills of teamwork, strategic vision and adaptation to change, which have been declared wishes for years (but not always in applied reality), are learning to learn and learning to be, within the key axes of a education that promotes self-knowledge, human integrity and a task that goes beyond what is productive and efficient, but rather incorporates the axes of comprehensive well-being as part of what is required.

No one wants (or shouldn’t look for) people who kill and die for work anymore, but rather people who love their work and take care of themselves sustainably. This is also the case with leadership, leaving behind those charismatic leaders and advancing to facilitators of collective learning.

There are several transformations that invite us to look again at our own skills and those that must be developed by an educational and social system that aims to achieve a more sustainable and happy world, in a context of wide and endless change and uncertainty.

Learning to constantly change is becoming, in a certain way, an expert learner, someone who is constantly incorporating new knowledge, and who manages to go further by translating that learning into behaviors and habits that transform their lives and their environment.

We already know, profusely, that knowledge does not change our way of being and doing, but rather provides us with new content that lodges in the dimension of cognition. However, by not applying this knowledge and bringing it into our lives on a daily basis, it becomes inert and loses its potential to produce change in people. That is why the new skills must be in the applied world, from emotional intelligence used in the daily service of our personal management, through leadership, communication and the management of uncertainty, which beyond concepts have their everyday applications.

Reviewing our own skills and inviting us to improve in each of the opportunity gaps we can find is a necessary exercise. We at HPI International are helping companies and universities to be able to know their levels of competence and prepare themselves with the skills that are required today and that will be vital for the future of people, teams and organizations.

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The thoughtless euphoria

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These are new political times in Chile, there is no doubt. Not only has a new government taken office, but also a new generation, the result of a new cultural framework that year after year is leaving behind the old values ​​of order, structure and forms, to seek to refound a new social order strongly based on the emotions of the moment and hyperbole ideas not yet settled.

Clearly, we have to want the best for this new cycle and the people responsible for driving it. To want the opposite would be to wish one’s own evil. However, as it has always been, what happens does not depend only on the new authorities, but on each person who is part of the existing social fabric (or unweaving).

The construction of new instances of encounter, dialogue and agreement has been something that is perceived as lost within this new cycle. It seems that like an adolescent who reveals himself from his parents, considering that they know nothing, contribute nothing and nothing of them should be adopted for his own future, in the same way, this new atmosphere seems to refuse to look, weigh and leave the good of the old in order to build looking to the future. On the contrary, it seems that the desired future is a copy of a distant past, deeply idealized and drawn in black and white that do not honor the truth of the facts.

In social psychology, the subject of mass phenomena has been widely addressed, how emotions become contagious and states become increasingly unconscious and thoughtless, and this seems to be a clear case of that, in an idealization and thoughtless euphoria that can end like the most idyllic dream that ends with the alarm clock, from one moment to another, without warning and in an uncomfortable way.

Is there something wrong with being in this state? Maybe not in itself. More than bad, it gives us the feeling that something good is happening and something better is yet to come. The main point, which in my opinion seems to be dangerous, is the loss of reflective capacity to make decisions that may be necessary today (not always comfortable) with the aim of achieving something that is better understood tomorrow. And just as the new elites are brimming with utopia, and the media seek to be “in tune” with the mass fashion of the moment, people have been infected, because in the same way, the thoughtlessness of the masses permeates a dangerous mirage to its authorities, that it could leave us all worse off than before this dream.

You yearn for the good, recognizing the concrete and the real scope, is a basic principle to give continuity to a larger project, to something that aims to last longer than a mere one-night party. But it seems like everyone wants to get drunk today no matter what happens tomorrow.

We have to hope that the awakening is not sudden, that the dream does not quickly turn into a nightmare, and that the reason beaten by the desire to believe in the illusion can recover quickly and does not remain dejected on the canvas of the social ring.

We’ll see how this process continues, which we hope will be better than it seems from afar.

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Education without direction

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Almost all of us have witnessed the changes that the educational system has had in recent decades, whether we have experienced it as students, parents or family members. Not only have the names of the subjects taught in schools been changing, but also the priority they have within the curriculum, increasingly thought of in those areas that are sought to be measured in standardized tests in order to “compete ” with the world.

This is how we no longer see philosophy (essential for learning to think and question things), or we find fewer and fewer hours of physical education (key to health, motor skills and motor development) or we have put aside the plastic arts or musicals, which are a real gym for our cognitive, sensory and brain development.

It seems that everything we need to know is based on mathematics and language, as if learning were not connected to other areas in our brain and these two elements of content were enough to form people.

There are many other variables that have been affecting, such as the important gaps that a large number of teachers have to carry out a good teaching-learning job, or the disengagement and neglect of families towards the development and formation of values and habits of their own children.

With all that we can see is that education, which is a fundamental pillar in the development of people and society, has been subjected to a game of more political and aesthetic whims, than to management from the importance that it has. , with the most diverse disciplines and the understanding of the diversity of people and talents, instead of the standardization of poorly qualified labor.

While the changes in the world ask us for greater creativity, innovation and the ability to navigate in a complex and uncertain environment, we are taught rules that must be memorized and repeated, limiting the expression of the arts, the body and experimentation, so necessary to achieve what we really need to use in our day to day. Meanwhile we talk about innovation, we continue to teach to have “the right answer” and “not to be wrong” through a system that evaluates blind obedience and not conscious reflection and constructive questioning to achieve new answers through natural trial and error.

At the time of criticism, there are many voices that we can point out elements that must be corrected, however, at the time of the changes it seems that neither the authorities, nor the unions, nor the affected themselves (students and families, to mention a par, since this affects the whole society) seem to realize the tremendous error and risk that this means for our minds, our integral development, the future we are building and for the daily destiny that we run with so much evolutionary lameness.

Thus, education must be what it has always been. An instance of game, trial and error for discovery that excites, creates and helps us go further, from what seems simple and minor to us, to what transforms the reality of millions. We need to understand again that we should start each day with physical education, learn to live together, eat and nourish ourselves, learn to respect each other, before thinking about how many points we had in math or science. We must understand that the arts stimulate our brains and our hearts in such a way that they help us channel experiences and emotions, creating new things that help innovate and change what is given.

It is time for us to put everything in its place. The slogans in the manuals of marketing and study of mass psychology, and education at the center of our deep development and not competition in a useless stick for blind competition.

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Effective, affective and superficial communication

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Something that people do permanently, is related to communication. Regardless of what we do or stop doing, the context in which we are, or whether we do it in a spoken way or in the deepest silence, we are constantly communicating and communication is part of our life.

However, although we do it at all times, they did not teach us how to do it, but we learned with the people with whom we share and grow up. That is, we learn by imitation. We do not always have people who do it in a good way and that is why communication is a challenge and impacts so strongly on our relationships and our achievements, since it is through this very human act that we are able to transmit and connect with other people.

Much has been said about communication and much has been written, different models seek to explain how it works, the types of communication and the roles within a communicative act.

In this article I want to share with you three types of communication that mark our interactions and that can help us improve our way of relating to ourselves and those around us. I am referring to effective, affective and superficial communication.

We have heard a lot about effective communication. There is no communication, leadership or teamwork workshop in which this term is not mentioned, although many times it is not so clear what it is, or how to achieve it.

Effective communication is essentially the ability to state our points about something clearly, so that other people understand it and can focus on the ideas we are raising, therefore, it is focused on talking about “something”, about ” what happens ”, so that in this way we can focus, agree on points and mobilize. It is a more pragmatic and “productive” communication, which is why it is so often mentioned in work environments.

On the other hand, we have affective communication, which incorporates other dimensions of internal skills. Communication affects does not talk about “what happens” but talks about “what happens to us”, that is, it opens the internal states, thoughts, emotions, needs. This type of communication is fundamental since it allows us to really connect between people and from that connection find new ways to face needs and achieve our creative potential.

Much is said about effectiveness, but it is forgotten that without affectivity it becomes dehumanized and, therefore, not sustainable over time.

Another communication is what we could call superficial. Which is, essentially, an avoidance communication, of resistance. It is when you want to avoid both what happens and what happens to us, where you do not want a real connection, both talking about things that do not involve anything (distractors), and also acting as a listening that really does not exist.

This type of communication disconnects us from ourselves and from other people, having very negative consequences for our relationships, our internal processes and the desire to achieve things in our lives. Unfortunately, many people live with this communication and do not even realize it.

All types of communication have a function, they require internal skills and we can train them to improve them, know when to use them and be able to promote them in our environments and relationships.

Which one are you going to use today?

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How to define goals for this new year

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Many people have the ritual of making personal balances each time a new year ends and along with it, of establishing new goals for the time that begins. There are also those who suggest the importance of decreeing our wishes so that they are fulfilled in the new calendar cycle. But for what and why define new goals? Is it really any use?

In ancient times the annual calendar began on March 1, until Julius Caesar established that January 1 was a day dedicated to the god Juno, a Roman deity of beginnings and new beginnings. It was with the Gregorian calendar that this date was established as the beginning of each year, and from there that the celebration that we have today extends.

There are many rites that have been incorporated (and others are being forgotten) at this time. Perhaps one of the most widespread is related to establishing the goals and wishes that we want to fulfill each time a new year begins, trying to make them come true and we can achieve what we want within ourselves.

However, many times when we want to do this projection exercise we do not really know how to start or how to do it, and here I want to share some ideas that may help you.

First of all, it is important to keep in mind that it is not enough to decree something for this to happen. Many people spread the idea that it is only necessary to decree for the universe to fulfill your wishes. However, they forget something fundamental and I am referring to the law of cause and effect. For this reason, it becomes crucial not only to establish clear goals that we can establish on our horizon, but also to generate the causes for the effects that we are looking for, that is, to make sure that these results occur, through our decisions and constant behaviors.

A second important point is related to what is called the “axis of fluidity” and that it is a way for our goals to mobilize us more, motivate us and become “better goals”. The axis of fluidity states that every goal or objective must be in a balance between its level of challenge and the level of realism.

Many times we set very challenging goals, on Monday or this year, I will change my whole life, all my habits, etc. It becomes so challenging that it finally paralyzes us and that makes us unable to really move forward. That we give up before our time. It is very common that we want to achieve a gigantic amount of things in the next 12 months, and we forget how much we can achieve of ourselves if we set goals for 5 or 10 years.

On the other hand, realism is also important, because if our goals are so challenging that they stop being realistic, we give up before we start. Both dimensions impact not only on the viability of what we want, but also on the motivation we have to be able to achieve our goals. Therefore, seek that balance, a goal that is challenging and realistic at the same time.

Finally, we can also incorporate a principle that has been studied in various research on achievement, habits, and personal performance. It’s the small changes that generate the big results.

Although it seems very evident to us that big changes generate big results, the evidence shows the opposite. It is the small changes sustained over time that generate the achievement of great goals. If you want to change your habits, improve your health, enhance your relationships, increase your income or make your personal project grow, then you must identify a small change that impacts those results, modify it and sustain it daily. Once you have adopted it, then it will be a good time to incorporate another small sustained change.

This new year, like every new day, is a tremendous opportunity that you have at hand to make things go better, so that life has that taste that you really yearn for inside, and although not everything depends on you, a lot does. It does, as long as you put commitment, dedication and persistence, any goal can be approached until you have it in your hands. The next step is up to you.

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The future in your hands

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It is true that not all things depend on us, that many times what we understand as “reality” exceeds our desires and prevails, twisting our desires and generating different results.

Many times, it is these experiences and the frustrations they generate, which have led us to feel and believe that the future depends on other people, entities or factors. At times it seems that people are like leaves when the wind blows, with the hidden desire that it does not take us to the unwanted destination.

However, this is not true. One of the qualities of human beings is our creative ability. Not only can we dream new things, create expressions of art, manifest our desires in physical and metatarsal form, but we are also capable of creating our conditions, changing our abilities, shaping our character and moving towards what we really yearn for.

Obviously it is not instantaneous, that it is not enough to say “decree it”, but it requires work, mainly in the most internal and invisible dimensions of our being, but that mark the person we are and who we can become.

I personally believe that it is the best time to stop complaining, making excuses and blaming the rest, to govern our own destinies, play our cards and bet on our causes. Certainly on that path we will meet other people who are also going in that direction, and with whom we will be able to team up and share the route. But we cannot wait for something to happen that we want but for which we do not work.

It is important to claim our creative ability and use it consciously and deliberately. Is the time.

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Emotional intelligence in times of polarization

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These are times of polarization in the world. They are promoted by vaccines and by those who do not want them; those who fight for environmental causes and those who want to look elsewhere to continue producing as before; governments of one color and those of the other; social networks full of aggressive messages and that disqualify and deny anyone who is different from themselves, while with a tone of morality they accuse their victims of being intolerant. Really, the world upside down or perhaps, the unconscious world without real mirrors.

Polarization and the inability to see other people as equals and part of the same system is, in part, the permanent problem of the ego, that part of our mind that wants to invent an “I” separate from a “you” and seek enclose a space that feels its own and of value, for which it seeks to differentiate itself, move away and build the world in opposition, in the eternal logic of: “I am not like you.”

This that occurs in our mind and in our social and family life, is also replicated in the larger systems, in society as a whole, the institutions, the global system. It is the inability to look at oneself with honesty, in order to later be able to see the other for what he is: an other as legitimate as oneself.

However, to advance on that path, you have to go up evolutionary steps. It is not reaching out and saying it. It is about taking an inner journey that requires dedication, balls and a real desire to improve, not to appear superior.

This trip requires working on self-awareness, looking at yourself, recognizing what is there without hiding or hiding under the rug. Self-awareness is the first pillar in the development of emotional intelligence, and an essential step to advance to the second pillar: self-regulation.

That ability to regulate our impulses, to stop reacting to things and begin to choose our steps and decisions. When we are not capable of self-regulation, then it is easy to establish this polarity, because I do not take care of what is mine and I deposit it in a projected way in the “evils of the other”, and in this way the polarity continues to be reinforced instead of advancing to evolutionary integration.

Self-motivation, as a third axis of emotional intelligence, also shows us the revelation of activating within us the fuel that moves our lives, and to stop being circus animals that are trained to react to rewards and punishments from the environment. Thus, many people explain their decisions and behavior “because the other person did or said something”, without being responsible for themselves or their own motivations.

Empathy and social skills are the other two pillars of emotional intelligence, and these help us to connect with those around us, to tune into their ideas and emotions, to understand their motivations and positions and from there to access other internal worlds , expand our mental map and also enrich our own experience.

Connect as equals, understand that one’s own and that of others are housed in different “homes”, but that they are part of the same thing, a great system in which we are all the same in essence, and that other people’s paths also serve me to reflect my own steps in autonomy and ability.

The current polarization shows us the enormous path we have in learning to be what we are and then build with other people and that mission is beautiful, noble and necessary to be done.

Every time you see yourself in polarity or witness that polarization, don’t join in. Take a step back, and recognize yourself, learn something new about yourself and move on. Not forwards or to surpass someone else, but upwards but within yourself, using emotional intelligence in times of polarization.

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5 keys to starting a new business

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In recent years the economy has undergone important transformations, which have been accelerated by the pandemic and its impact on the economy, the world of work and, very strongly, on the emotional impact it has had on millions of people around the world.

This context leads many people to seek to undertake new directions, something that gives them a sense of purpose and the possibility of making their lives something different, that allows them to obtain a better material quality of life, but above all greater psychological and emotional well-being.

However, many people do not really know how to do it or where to start this new moment in life. Personally, I have had the possibility of directing and founding several businesses and during the last decade I have gone through good and bad moments, in which one learns a few things.

It is essential for me to point out that for this there is no single recipe, finally each person creates their own path. However, it seems to me that we can always learn from some experiences of people who have embarked on the path that we are looking for at this moment. So if you are thinking of starting your own business and starting to live off your passion, I want to share with you 5 keys to starting a new business:

1. Express a passion:

No matter what you have in mind, if what you are going to do expresses your passion and a personal mission, you will be able to access a powerful intrinsic motivation that will help you to give your best and work with dedication and commitment to make your project succeed. concrete and deliver the results you are looking for. If you are starting your business, you have taken the “hard” road and that requires the best of you. Also, when you follow a passion, other people perceive it, it spreads and that will help you get clients, allies and make your project grow.

2. Build systems:

Setting up a business requires carrying out a series of tasks that could consume your days, without respite. Work always abounds when you have your own business, so you need to build systems that can operate with technology, automation and through which the people who can be part of your team can participate and empower. Systems are essential because they help enhance your capabilities, make your business grow and systematize fundamental areas. There are no profitable businesses that can grow without systems that make that possible. Analyze your work model, what you want to offer and build work systems, processes and technologies so that you can continue to grow.

3. Take care of cash flow:

Nowadays it is very easy to start a business with very little money, even without money (although it sounds little credible to many people). However, what can not be missing is a constant flow of cash. Every business needs to constantly generate new income. Beyond if they are little or a lot of money, you need to ensure that your business constantly receives cash to continue projecting your business, providing services and that your venture manages to give you and those who correspond, the necessary resources to stay healthy and motivated.

4. Build alliances:

In the same way that the world is increasingly globalized, business is also increasingly conducted in networks and partnerships. No company can do it all alone, and even if it can, it is not smart to do so. Suppliers, allies and specialized areas are required in different things that are not the core of your business. For this, building alliances is essential and knowing how to create them with those who will really help you get where you want is also an important talent; Entrepreneurs often forget because of the rush to carry out their projects, they get together with those who are not the right people, and that should not happen to you.

5. Always innovate:

It does not matter in what field you want to start or how you want to carry out your business, something that will help you a lot is to be constantly innovating, doing new things and testing strategies and content that you have not done yet. Allocate part of your profits to the development of new products or to innovation in your systems. The only way to be competitive in a global context with so much offer will be if you always keep innovating for what is to come.

I really want you to be successful in your projects, if you are thinking of taking this step to a personal project that really makes sense to you, you are making a good decision. However, if making the decision seemed complex to you, now comes the best part: making your ideas materialize in reality and this will require your perseverance, dedication, creativity and hard work. Enjoy the journey and achieve your results.

If you want a guide to develop a profitable business, I share this course that I took when cough, from being a company with 500 dollars of capital, to one with 6 million dollars in valuation. I hope you like this trip where I will tell you in detail those things that I learned and I am sure they will help you too. Review course here